The real role of godparents is revealed in the years following the godchild’s baptism. Second, Godparents had to protect the doctrine of the Faith from paganism and persecution in the early days. Choosing a friend or relative as godparent may enlarge the family, but it can also add to family drama and discord. “But I think the babies intercede for them.”. Today, it is far less likely that some impostor would seek baptism under false pretenses. “It brought him back to the parish, back to Mass, back to being engaged in the life of the church in a way he hadn’t been before,” Ms. Nelson said. When you register, you’ll get unlimited access to our website and a free subscription to our email newsletter for daily updates with a smart, Catholic take on faith and culture from, We’re sorry registration isn't working smoothly for you. So how does one go about this task? Ms. Adams was raised culturally Catholic—“statues all over the place,” she said—but her mother did not go to Mass, and Ms. Adams drifted toward the Baptist Church. You can also manage your account details and your print subscription after logging in. And she holds out hope that the child’s father will also draw closer to the church. Since you’re a frequent reader of our website, we want to be able to share even more great, As a frequent reader of our website, you know how important, Godfriends: when your godchild happens to be an adult, In rare rebuke, Cardinal Cupich criticizes USCCB president’s letter to President Biden, Pope Francis sends greeting to President Biden, contrasting with sharper message from head of U.S. bishops, How Joe Biden’s Catholic faith will shape his relationship with Pope Francis—and the U.S. bishops, Five faith facts about Biden VP Kamala Harris, O Death, Where Is Thy Sting? “If they don’t [know their faith], their mother certainly does, and she makes sure things happen,” Ms. Crino said. Ms. Crino is the director of religious education and a pastoral associate at St. Emily Church in Mount Prospect, Ill. She has been working for the church in Chicago for 34 years. YES! A baptized non-Catholic may be picked as a Christian Witness if he or she meets the set requirements. You can do this by setting aside a special time that you and your godchild can spend together. My job was to pray with them and to pray for them and to be present as much as they needed me.”. While some faith communities may expect godparents to raise their godchildren if the parents die, neither civil nor church law recognizes such an obligation. The login page will open in a new tab. 2. The godparents were the ones expected to raise the orphaned child. “These are folks who are raised with nothing. No Catholic family members on either side unfortunately. The Godparent must be suitable for this role and have the intention of fulfilling it. She blogs daily at simchafisher.com and weekly at The Catholic Weekly. Although the godmother’s husband (and father of her godson) is not Catholic, the couples talk about faith all the time and laugh about it. if you are trying to comment, you must log in or set up a new account. Does it make a difference who you choose to be your children’s Godparents? If the person to be baptized is a baby or young child, the godparent or godparents speak on his or her behalf at the baptism, responding to the question, “What do you ask of God’s church?” with the answer “Faith!”, But on the godparents’ role after the baptism, the church is less specific. “Asking someone to be a godparent is a big deal, kind of like asking someone to walk you down the aisle at your wedding,” Ms. Adams said. When Ms. Adams’s husband, Stacey, was married to his now ex-wife, they chose his best friend and her sister as godparents to their three sons. Ms. Hayes left the faith but reverted as a young adult. ​​The early Christians faced persecution during the formative years of Christianity (circa 300 AD). After her reversion, Ms. Ekblad said, she realized godparents should be more than “just buddies.” But she did not know any practicing Catholics other than her parents; so she chose them as godparents for her fifth child. A baptized non-Catholic may be picked as a Christian Witness if he or she meets the set requirements. ​​The Catholic Church also has a set of specific requirements for people who are to fulfill the role of godparent. For more on choosing godparents, check out the FAQ above, Belonging: Baptism in the Family of God – Role of Godparents and Fr. “It’s very difficult. ​Godparents were also responsible for preserving Christian doctrine and ensuring that it was not infiltrated by pagans. It is expected that a godparent be a firm believer in the teachings of the Catholic Church, and be ready to take on the role of a spiritual guide for the newly baptized. She said her tio was a “good Catholic,” but she never expected him to teach her son any theology. Therefore, each parent should choose a godparent not just because of a blood relationship or friendship; rather, a godparent should be a trustworthy witness of the faith who will help the godchild attain salvation. “She was a child of the light,” Ms. Nelson remembers the priest saying. ​Does this person understand the seriousness of a godparent's responsibilities, especially in the aspect of faith and morality? “I talk to them about picking out a cross and putting it in their child’s room, about getting a children’s Bible and reading it to them. To begin the … Regularly check in on your godchild to ask about his or her needs and struggles and pray about them. Then they discovered that the child had a severe heart defect and encephalitis. “Her family was already buying candles and rosaries in Mexico, and she was planning to get Bailey stuff on her trip to Israel. “It’s not worth it to fight it.”. The church requires at least one godparent who is a practicing, confirmed Catholic age 16 or older. That godparent's name is entered into the parish record book as the "official" godparent … “You’re trying to take people where they’re at.”, When parents choose godparents, they often do not look to people who know more about the faith than they do and who might fill in the gaps in their child’s religious education. The baby, named Betsy, was born almost full term. “It’s part of our friendship to discuss the faith, and I don’t feel like I need to tiptoe around the topic,” Ms. Hayes said, adding that she did not have a “big plan” to bring him into the Catholic Church. Tiny pieces of plastic waste, already found at the top of Mount Everest and the bottom of the ocean, may now have a toehold in the human womb, writes Kathleen Bonnette. Leticia Ochoa Adams, a writer who lives in Texas, said that in Hispanic culture choosing godparents is almost like adding to the family. Considering the influence and custodial responsibility that godparents have over their godchild, much more thought must be put into choosing a godfather or godmother. But sometimes, said Catherine Crino, they want something more. As all of us are practicing Catholics, my sister and her husband wanted to have my brother and I over for a “godparent lunch” to discuss how they saw our role as godparents in their child’s life and what we understood this important role to be. Read an excerpt from Fr. It’s [a matter of] God’s grace and his own path.”. When Catholics come to the United States, they transmit their faith for about a generation and a half, she said. As a frequent reader of our website, you know how important America’s voice is in the conversation about the church and the world. When as a teenager she gave birth to her first child, Anthony, she chose her uncle as the godfather. Their parents, if they are Catholic at all, are usually agreeable to the idea but are not always invested or catechized. You can’t drag someone into the church. It is possible to have only one godparent, but if there are two, there must be one male and one female. They want something for their kids, or they see something in their fiancé’s family, and they want to be a part of it.”, Years ago, she co-authored a book on baptism preparation, but she said it would not be useful now, considering how poorly catechized so many parents are. When Joan Nelson’s lifelong friend Cathy asked her to be the godmother for her unborn daughter, she readily agreed. His relationship with God as a Catholic will help him to do so. You can either click on the link in your confirmation email or simply re-enter your email address below to confirm it. A non-Catholic person may not be a godparent at a Catholic baptism. For some parents the choice seems obvious; for others it is a struggle. Of course, we all would like to honor those who are dear to us, but the Baptism of your child may not be the right time to do so. Ms. Ekblad does not know if the relationships between these pairs would be as strong as they are without that spiritual tie, but she is certain it is good for the older kids to have the responsibility of praying for their siblings and being active in forming their faith. ​Does this person have the solid moral character necessary to become a good role model for the child? Some describe feeling pressure from friends and family to choose someone they consider to be unsuitable for the task. “We wanted my kids to have an example in the faith, which is hard to come by—someone practicing, close to God, someone approachable, honest about the faith, someone I am close with,” Ms. Hayes said. Last but not the least, godparents were essential spiritual guides for children whose Christian parents were persecuted and martyred. Barbara Dawson said that she barely knew Ruby, her daughter Bailey’s confirmation sponsor. But this ubiquitous Catholicism, she said, is mainly a cultural identity and lacks a spiritual component. ​Many times, parents choose their child’s godparents simply because they have been part of their family’s life. “I just feel it in my heart,” she said. “She brought a lot of light into the world for a long time.”. ​Being a godparent is therefore more than just fulfilling a centuries old Catholic tradition. Someone from one of the Eastern Churches may be a godparent, but only if there is also a Catholic godparent. We can't do it without you—America Media relies on generous support from our readers. “They want something, but they can’t articulate it at all,” Ms. Crino said. “The majority probably aren’t practicing [Catholics]. A godparent must be Catholic. Choosing a Godparent How to chose a Godparent(s) for your child. Is this person reliable enough to maintain a long-term relationship with the godchild? “I just picked people I liked [for godparents].”. Canon law says godparents must be practicing Catholics, be at least 16 years old (with some exceptions) and have received the three sacraments of initiation (baptism, confirmation and the Eucharist). Ms. Nelson said, “I say he’s not Catholic—yet.”. The work of choosing and being a godparent can lead to hurt feelings, dashed expectations—and the occasional influx of unexpected grace. A correction has been made to this article, which appeared in the October 15, 2018 issue. During the celebration of the sacrament of baptism, the godparents make a promise to assist the parents of the child in fulfilling their responsibility of forming the child in the Catholic faith. raise your child in the Catholic Faith. Your source for jobs, books, retreats, and much more. Logging in will also give you access to commenting features on our website. How to choose: Non-Hispanic Catholics are sometimes taken aback by the warmth and enthusiasm Hispanic godparents or confirmation sponsors (often the same person) bring to the relationship. Instead, Ms. Crino said, “They pick nice people who sometimes have less of a clue than the parents do.”. ​Many times, parents choose their child’s godparents simply because they have been part of their family’s life. If you are choosing two godparents, one must be male and the other female. Who can be a Godparent? James Martin’s new book on prayer. She had a beautiful life,” Ms. Nelson said. “My tio was super serious, but he was like a dad to me and Anthony, so the godparent thing just took it a step further. She said the book “assumed a level of conversation with the faith that a lot of parents just don’t have.”, “Someone practicing, close to God, someone approachable, honest about the faith, someone I am close with.”, Early in her career, Ms. Crino would try to engage new parents in “long conversations about St. Augustine and original sin,” until she realized that the new moms were “ready to kill [her] because it was time to nurse.”. This was the case with Ms. Adams’s own godmother, who no longer acknowledges their relationship. She tries to present the church’s teaching on godparents as a positive opportunity rather than a list of rules. Now, he is imagining a better church. Sometimes it is someone she would have never considered on her own or someone the family does not see often. She had heart surgery and lived to be 9 years old before her shunt finally failed. A large number of those surveyed said they view the role of a godparent as simply an honorary title bestowed on some favorite relative or friend in a one-day ceremonial event. “It was 100 percent a choice of respect,” Ms. Adams said. They see their peers receiving sacraments and want that for themselves. Baptism rites all over the country use the same words, but what it means to be “ready to help” varies by region, culture, generation and even by individual Catholic. Sometimes the grandparents are pressuring them to go through with it; sometimes they are simply looking for a beautiful backdrop for what they see as a purely cultural rite of passage for their baby. Ms. Ekblad has suffered many miscarriages, and she chooses godparents for those children, too. Baptism - Choosing Godparents The responsibility assumed by a godparent is not one to be taken lightly, and parents are encouraged to choose carefully. But Maria Hayes, who immigrated from Warsaw two years ago, said that at least in Poland, strong religious identity does not always translate into strong personal faith. The role our godparents have in our journey here on earth is actually so much more significant so we must be careful in the people we choose to take up that role. Today her class is about half Filipinos, Poles and Indians. Ms. Nelson said that many older children who seek baptism are not being raised Catholic but attend Catholic school. You can then make this simple activity much more meaningful by incorporating a spiritual element to it like reading Bible verses or talking about the lives of saints. How to Choose a Godparent. Choosing godparents SPONSORS: (Code of Canon Law #’s 872-874) The responsibility of choosing godparents is a serious one that should be thought and prayed about. Either gender godparent 's responsibilities, especially in the aspect of faith special role in the decision the United,! 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